Technology Time Out

| charliearchbold

casual-tuesdays

Last week there was a black out in the city where I live. Plunged into darkness as the lights went out across the whole state, families and individuals had to change plans. We had to come up with inventive ways to tackle the problems of no power and ways to entertain ourselves without technology.

Once the terror of having no internet had passed, the world didn’t stop and people didn’t sit round like pumpkins waiting to be picked, on the contrary we found other things to do. Over the next few days there were stories of how families had played games together, how neighbours had rallied around the one house with a gas cooker and shared meals, how people helped strangers and the needy. It did get me thinking about why it takes an event like a power outage to make us do what we really like to do anyway; family, community, sharing.

Perhaps it’s more a question of balance. Technology makes our life easier in so many ways. Once you’ve had access to it you realise know how hard it would be to be without it. I’d wrestle any pickpocket who tried to take my smart phone. But the trick is we can, and maybe we should, put technology aside a little more often. In the blackout a lot of people went back to small pleasures, reading a book by candlelight, playing an instrument, board games with children. The fix it folk rigged up ways to heat and light homes and a lot of people went to bed earlier.

The power came back on, modern life resumed, but it showed how resourceful we can be and the entertainment we can find when we go off the grid for a little while.

 

Trust Yourself

| charliearchbold

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You know recently I’ve been second guessing my decisions and worrying over choices I’ve made. From big things to small things that annoying voice of doubt is getting a bit too loud for my liking. And while the inner critic can keep you in check it is not the boss. We are capable people but every so often we lose our way and it is at this point we need to reaffirm trust in ourselves.

Sleep is nature’s restorer and if I’m honest I haven’t been getting enough. There is nothing more invigorating than waking from a good night’s rest. Your head is clearer, your body feels fresher, and if you’re a night-time worrier everything seems better in the daylight! Making a concerted effort to nurture ourselves through sleep is a practical way to empower and ease tension.

Sometimes we lose trust in ourselves because we take on too many other people’s opinions and desires. Their energy and voice can leave us struggling to find our own. So if this is the reason you’re floundering respect your own wants and needs. If choices and decisions are our own we are much more likely to believe in them.

Feeling out of sorts about choices we are making can come from being out of touch with our own core values. It is often this mismatch between the actions we take, which do not reflect who we are, that can leave us second guessing. If we are making choices that do not reflect what we believe or stand for it can leave us in a state of turmoil.

Or maybe our self-confidence has taken off for a while. Without self belief we are more prone to question and doubt and that leaves us unsettled. If your confidence has taken a bit of a hit recently and you have lost trust in your decision-making, regaining self-confidence can be a powerful remedy. As our belief in ourselves grows so does our capacity to trust the choices we make.

Go to bed earlier, be around people who validate who you are and what you stand for, and be firm with doubt.

“Trust your own instinct. Your mistakes might as well be your own, instead of someone else’s.” Billy Wilder.

Get out of that comfort zone.

| charliearchbold

www.jasonhash.comDaughter 

She’s running on the beach, ahead of me, free.

I can’t run, I’m too old.

I can’t run, I’m too old.

The tide tumbles in, less dry sand paths between the trails of seeping sea.

Less places for lazy, sensible feet to land.

Water leaks into my shoes, cold, unwanted, wet.

I trot faster, tiptoeing, to find a way through.

Ahead of me she waves, beckoning.

A surge of eager water swamps my stubborn stride.

I can’t bear it.

The damp toes, tentative, weak little steps.

This isn’t me.

I start to run. And the sea urges me on with childish splashes of spray.

Feet are no longer quick sanded and weighted down, they’re light.

I run. I’m not too old.

I run. I’m not too old.

She waits for me, and we charge on, together.

©Charlie Archbold

Bravery

| charliearchbold

dogI’ve been thinking a lot about how bravery looks in my life and in the lives of the people around me. It’s such an empowering word, courageous, fearless, bold, no wonder we see it as such an admirable quality in people. But bravery seems to me to be so much more than that.

Close your eyes for a moment and think of the people in your life who you think of as brave. I bet there are a lot and I bet there are a lot of reasons why. We are lucky to have such inspiring people in our lives; to love, cherish and respect.

Their bravery probably takes many forms, sometimes huge demon slaying daring and sometimes fairy steps to battle smaller ghosts. But no matter what mountain those brave people are scaling they share a common trait. They are approaching challenge or chasing challenge with action and tenacity, they are not quitters.

The personal circumstances life throws at us are often beyond our control, illness, loss, despair, and it is out of these events or tragedies that we see remarkable bravery occur in the people around us. When we think on our friends and family who are dealing with these things we admire their dignity in coping with things they did not want or imagine happening in their lives.

You may have thought of other brave people in your life as the ones who seek out and take on the new and unexpected or those who leave the safe for the unknown. Sometimes the bravery we see in them seems easy but it’s probably not. To do anything outside our comfort zone is hard, which is why most of us don’t do it, and why we recognize the bravery in those that do.

You may have seen bravery in the people you know who challenge the status quo, who follow and act on ideals and values which make our world a better place. Swimming against the tide is hard but the brave people we know who do this have overcome fear to champion their causes.

We can see how the bravery of those we know is replicated on the wider human stage. Charities, laws, health care, social and political voice have all risen from the daily acts of bravery of ordinary people. They are living unexceptional lives but doing exceptional things.

I wonder if you thought about yourself when you were thinking of the brave people in your life? Chances are you are coping with and daily facing something which demands you to be strong. It may be small compared to someone else’s mountain but it still needs you to try, so be kind to yourself if you’re facing your fears.

Bravery has many romantic connotations but we mustn’t romanticize it, most very brave people are not immortalized as heroes and heroines. Often unexpected circumstances are the catalyst and it takes a great deal of strength to venture into the unknown. Bravery is thought and it is action, forced on us or chosen, it is responding to life’s bombshells actively and with self determination.

 

Beetroots

| charliearchbold

 

There’s no denying I’m often sucked into the latest health crazes and judging by the size of the industry I’m not alone. So what is it with the health world which lures us to rush head long into a mambo class, when you’ve got as much dance experience as a corn cob, or buy a juicer which you can never clean? Anything branded to get me blooming and in better shape has me chomping at the bit.

It was my recent encounter with beetroots that got me thinking I need to be a bit more discerning in my health choices. There’s no deny beetroots are a wonder veg, packed with nutrients and all the healing powers of a mighty root vegetable. But they are tough things to master.

To being with my bunch sat in the fridge for weeks and while my carrots went limp around them they remained fat and firm, no wonder they sustained the peoples of the Russian tundra for centuries. Eventually I had to deal with them. But cutting and peeling a raw beetroot is like penetrating a rock. And once you get at the flesh, bright red, inky juice, pours out of them. By the time I’d got them in the pan to boil my hands were stained like a butcher’s.

Unfortunately, after all the effort they didn’t taste too good, sort of like pink, vinegary mashed potatoes. Now while it was my cooking, and serious lack of seasoning, which rendered them mushy and tasteless I also realised I can get all the nutrients they provide from other foods I like far more.

I’ve done this before. I’ve got jars of superfood gazing out at me from the pantry in glorious shades of beige and all tasting a little like cardboard. Following what’s in health fashion for the sake of it is not always the best idea. What’s better is too think about what you want to achieve rather than the next quick fix. Health change, like all change, is about sticking with the goal and not changing it because of fashion. There are no short cuts.

The beetroot was a metaphor. We have so much choice in health and diet but don’t need it all to be healthy. Just because something is, good for you, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s, good for you. Many people love beetroots but personally I’m sticking with carrots and parsnips… but have you seen the purple ones…

Share the love

| charliearchbold

 

Celebrate the people you love because who knows when things might change?

We can’t help ourselves pushing forward with our own wants and desires but we have to make time for love. Love for partners, family, and friends. Whoever makes your heart crack when you think about missing them.

Without giving our love we are just bystanders in life, not really committing, and if you’re not present then you do miss out. So if you’ve been forgetting to tell the people you care about how much and why you love them, do it today. Every day is an opportunity to acknowledge and be grateful for all the love in our lives.

Perspective

| charliearchbold

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I was at a party on the weekend and was desperate for a glass of water. A lady was standing by the sink sipping on a cocktail and as I turned on the tap she asked me, “What are you doing?”

“Having a glass of water. Would you like one?”

“Hell no! Have you seen what that stuff does to ships!”

We laughed and in a way she was right, what may be good for my inner organs certainly rusts out a lot of other stuff. It got me thinking about perspective. For me the water made sense but for her not so much. And it wasn’t the water itself but the different attitudes we brought to it.

So, here’s the thing, we cannot help but bring our own perspective to anything. And that’s okay because it’s these things which make us who we are. But the problems set in when we hang onto them so tight that they become big giant monsters of self-righteousness, huffing around in an I’m right, you’re wrong corner.

The stand-off differing perspectives causes can be exhausting. And whether it’s with family members, partners or out in the wider community unresolved issues are unhealthy. If we keep spending all that energy on feeling misunderstood we’re not doing ourselves any favours because we may be missing solutions only a tiny side step away from what we think.

So we have choices we can accept the other person’s perspective, reconcile it and move on. Happy days. But sometimes no matter how hard we try we cannot accept it and then we have to let go of the indignation and call a friend! No seriously after the call we do need to try and move on. We can listen to their point of view and if we don’t agree it can be a buffer, clarify a situation, or maybe even be a call to action. Sometimes we don’t like their perspective because it challenges our sense of self but no matter how much we want people to see things our way the truth is they may not. The only thing we can do then is manage our response.

Sometimes I really struggle looking past my own interpretation of situations but when I can it’s a bit like climbing a hill. We don’t just look one way when we reach the top we look in every direction, take in every view. We do look a little longer at the view we like best but at least we do see the whole panorama. As Wayne Dyer says, “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.” Hard but worth a try?

Old Cat

| charliearchbold

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I have a friend who has a cat, Morris. She has had that cat for twenty two years. You’d think he’d be some sort of world record holder but in fact that belongs to Crème Puff who died in Austin, Texas, aged thirty eight! When I went to see her last week I was stuck by Morris and his longevity. With the average cat life expectancy around fifteen years he’s doing pretty well.

I asked her why she thought Morris was still with us and there were a few reasons. He keeps an even temperature. Most of his day is spent lying near a heater if it’s cold, or near an air conditioner if it’s hot. He eats well. Yes, no expense is spared, he dines on cat food garnished in parsley and unidentifiable greens. And lastly he keeps his stress levels down. No frenzied mice hunting for Morris, he’s locked inside at night and his cat flap secured so no strays or uninvited felines can bother him.

This seems like a longevity recipe for all of us.

Don’t stress.

Eat well.

And keep your home environment perfect for you.

Thank you Morris and I hope one day you can snatch that world record from Crème Puff.

 

Time to get spontaneous

| charliearchbold

 

Okay, so recently I’ve been erring on the conservative side. I actually think it’s time for me to shake things up a bit and put some energy back into my life. Change it up and bring back the spontaneity. Why? Because I quite like my impulsive free self and I’ve lost her recently.

So where to start?

I definitely need to be a bit braver. Not too crazy, I’m not ready for bungy jumping yet but I am ready to go out to a party on a whim or order food I’ve never tried before. And next time somebody asks me to do something outside my comfort zone I’m going to.

Sometimes though nobody asks you to do things which means driving it yourself. There can be no question we all have tendency to over think too many areas of our lives which leads to inaction. But a common criticism levied against young people is that they’re too impulsive and don’t think things through. So to create a change I’m going to have to find a balance. Do less of the thinking and more of the action.

And it’s not just in actions where I need to foster more spontaneity, my relationships could do with it too. Instead of being passive and expecting I need to initiate more. Suggest and plan things to do with the people I love. The obligations of our relationships can confine us but we can challenge them, make new memories and certainly make them more fun.

By being more spontaneous I plan to re-energize. Of course there are no guarantees, I may be allergic to spiky puff fish, or fall off a table dancing, but hopefully not. And as Henry Miller said, “All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous unpremeditated act without benefit of experience.”

Image by D Sharon Pruitt.